Hey there,
Welcome back. ❤️
So, I promised to keep you in tabs with what’s been going on with me in the past weeks. I kept my promise. 😁
Spoiler alert; this is a haphazard post and a vulnerable memoir, but a good read still, so, here you go!
March 22nd, 2020. 5:47pm.
It visited me this past week. This icy feeling that sends shivers down your spine with rising anxiety…
This was my last blog entry (unpublished though) before I was declared MIA here. 😂😂
I could not complete it for 2 months and 3 weeks and couldn’t start any other—I simply couldn’t find words to do so—my mind has been a creative mess these past weeks. A lot of things to write but no discipline to pen down the thoughts so I let them fly.
This whole thing (Covid-19 and the lockdown) got real for me when we had to shut down our hostels and return home.
It’s not exactly that we’ve never had viruses before this, of course HIV, Ebola and Lassa are still ravaging; however, the inability to understand fully the modus operandi of Covid-19 sent the world into panic, because for once western scientists who seemingly have all the answers lacked answers.
Personally, I was not particularly pleased to put a pause on school and classes (at least not with the much delay I have experienced in the last year).
Coming home I had to readjust to living with my family:
Of course at home there’s the advantage of having love and care, so I added a lil more weight. But, there’s the lax that comes with the comfort, so reading school books became less important.
In addition to this, some weeks before I came home, I had began to (after a long while) pray at a consistent time daily; coming home, my schedule was bunched up. I struggled with finding footholds again as much as the inconsistent power supply allowed.
Most days I woke angry with myself, because the previous day I did nothing important and I retired exhausted from the day’s activities.
Cooking (my least favorite chore) has become a pastime, and then there’s the unhealthy on-screen time I spent on social media.
There’s also been the online classes (paid, free) on any and everything; the books I started but haven’t finished and a room full of knowledge in my head from these sources that I may never use.
Have I mentioned the pressure to ‘come out of this lockdown with a new skill set or extra source of income’? This was the cause of the craze.
You see, before the lockdown, I had plans. I had areas of my life that I needed to do better at mapped out and the exact strategies planned out.
As good as my plans were they crumbled as sandcastles when I read the amazing sales copies and status updates with offers I did not need.
The “you will never have this offer again forever.” and “50% off sales.” got to me and my money and I paid and attended classes that I could not follow-up on, accumulating junk knowledge and wearying my soul.
Then in the past weeks preceeding this, my mum took ill. If you’ve ever had a sick parent you understand how much strain you put up with. Not because you don’t love them, no, but heck, parents are the caregivers and not the other way round, yay? So it feels unnatural when they suddenly need care.
Somehow I just expect they should always be strong. Maybe it’s just me, sha. 😂
Thankfully she’s back on her feet and stronger too.
So yay, it’s not been a complete tale of woes. 😁
I gleaned lessons from this period and great experience too.
First off, I cannot be swayed by sales copies—Not anymore. If it’s not what I want, I run flee.
Also, I began vocal coaching in this period: creating the lessons have been hectic, because I want to maintain excellent standards and A-grade delivery, but is it worth it? Definitely.
For staying with me this far, amma share my game changer with you—Evaluation.
I sat back after weeks and looked at my life, it wasn’t making progress at a pace I desired, consequently I created a new plan.
I listen to Pastors Steven Furtrick and Joel Osteen, besides my Pastors. Their perspectives changed my mind.
I decided to focus on a single course of action per day and if it wasn’t completed I’d move it to the next day.
Brethren and sisthren, 😁 this is what changed my life.
I also wrote out affirmations to guide my mind during the day.
I then adjusted my sleep schedule from 3am-9am to 8pm-2am to avoid waking up jetlagged. Though I do not strictly follow the time, I work around it.
Nowadays, I wake hours before sunlight and put my head straight before the day begins officially.
It’s fun having my life back in control, at least for the moment.
Having honest conversations with my friends have helped too.
And music! How could I forget? My most played songs in this season have been Maverick music’s albums, Steffany Gretzinger’s new album—Forever Amen and Ty Bello’s spontaneous worship series. (Of course all these songs are spontaneous worship.)
There’s still more I’m yet to achieve (like my guitar classes that I have been procrastinating for weeks now) but I’m taking each day as it comes, a step at a time.
It’s better to make a little progress per day than none at all.
So, yay, there you have it. How’s lockdown been for you?
Have you had parent-sibling clashes? An onslaught of negative emotions? Stupid decisions?
How’s Bible study and prayer time been for you too?
I’d love to hear from you in the comment section.
Xoxo,
GJ
I believe part of your story is happening almost everywhere,cos I try to do most things I use to do while school was in session. But anyways I can’t relent on my effort.
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Absolutely, Sis. We won’t relent. ♥️
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Nice one😍
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💜
Thank you.
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I feel like I’m reading the story of my life this lockdown 😂😂😂.
I’ve never appreciated school more, the fact that it gave me a strict schedule to work by (even though the schedule was tedious) helped me maximize my time. Now, with so much free time on my hands, the center can no longer hold 😩😂.
But I’m so evaluating my life and taking charge after reading this 💪🏿
Thanks a lot GeeJay 🤗.
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Fam, things fell apart for real. 😂
All the love and more. 💜
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Hurricane rona has really been showing itself 🤦♀but God has our back.
I’ve stayed so long at home and I think I’ve gotten to the “see finish” stage with my siblings. 😂
Trying to stay productive in a pandemic can be “somehow” but we’re trying. Thanks for coming back Adiaha💃 😘
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The see-finish stage oh! 😂
God dey, sis. We shall all be “un-seen”.
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G.J, this is absolutely beautiful and amazingly relatable. We move, and take it a pace a time. Slowly and progressively. Thanks a lots for penning this down, we have missed you.
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A pace at a time, Sis. 💕
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
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Amazing 👌, I can totally relate, you are not alone sis. One step at a time
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Nice
Well done ma
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Thank you. 💜
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This is really relatable, I mean I just had to take a break and restrategise. Thank you for this beautiful piece ❤️
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