Posted in Healthup with GJ

Gutters and bacteria crossing

So, today I brought some premium gist, but before I serve you, amma tell you some side-gist, just because you’re my guy.

So, whilst in junior high school, (I attended a same-sex school for junior year and coeducational for senior year) we had this teacher, female, who taught us that crossing gutters caused UTIs (urinary tract infections) because as you opened your legs to cross the gutter, the bacteria would diffuse into your v-baby (vagina). Ridiculous, right? But, we believed her.

For years I never crossed a gutter, because I didn’t want bacteria in my v-baby. Until the day I met a gutter with no slab, there was no other way around it, and I had to cross to the other side of the road. After weighing my options for a few minutes, guy, I forgot about v-baby and jumped.

To Jesus be my glory for I did not come down with a UTI, (lol) but there’s an even better reason why—because UTIs are not contracted by gutter crossing.

The simplest and easiest way to contract a UTI is by wiping your nether regions from back to front instead of front to back. Lemme tell you why.

Before I tell you why, I’ll tell you what.

UTIs are a family of infections that affect the urinary tract, made up of your kidneys, where urine is produced, ureters, tubes that take the urine out of the kidney, bladder where urine is stored, and the urethra which helps you to void.

Now, to the “why.”

The large intestine houses several bacteria, the commonest of them being Escherichia Coli (code name, E. Coli), a very badt guy, implicated in most UTIs.

How does it pass from large intestine to the urinary tract? Via the anus. Understand that the digestive tract is directly linked to your anus, food you eat is disposed of by poop; and the urinary tract is directly linked to your external sex organ, vagina/penis as the case may be.

When we excrete/poop, we release E. Coli in excreta. When we wipe, we can help E. Coli find free access to our urinary tract (especially females) by wiping from back to front.

It is advised that we wipe from front to back so E. Coli stays in its place. At the large intestine, it is not harmful, but if it enters v-baby, wahala dey.

Later, thinking about it, I asked myself why I still believed that bacteria, in the split of seconds I use for gutter crossing can diffuse up to my height, get past the several layers of clothing and enter my v-baby. It’s an adverse effect of mental conditioning sha.

So, that’s it, guys, wipe from front to back and stay safe from UTIs.

Till I write you again, emem ye ifure (peace and serenity).